It is a bitterly cold, grey and snowy afternoon. We are expecting 15-20cm more snow and the wind chill is currently hovering around minus 20 degrees Fahrenheit. It is about as blustery as January tends to get and I have taken to my bed. I am not hiding from the weather, however, I am hiding from a body that is feeling absolutely crappy.
I seem to have hit the wall and am now walking that delicate balance between the disease and the cure. I am on Day 8 of a 60mg dose of Prednisone and it is starting to take its toll. My heart is racing, I feel shaky inside my body, I cannot seem to settle to anything and I am exhausted. I am not sleeping because when I lie down at night my heart pounds as if I have just had a few wicked shots of espresso. When I do sleep, I dream horrible things and awaken feeling groggy and disoriented.
So now I have to decide how to proceed from here. I have two options; option one is to cut the treatment short by at least five days and risk my severe eczema flare rearing its ugly head again. Option two is to stay the Prednisone course and keep feeling progressively more out of my body.
Honestly, neither option feels all that appealing.
There is an angry little kid inside me stomping her feet and yelling…”this is why I hate pharmaceutical medications…!!!!!”
For now, I will just ride out the stormy weather from the comfort of my cozy flannel bed and deeply appreciate the fact that I can stay here as long as I need to. I am still on holiday, I have no work to do, dinner tonight is easy and my kids are all happy doing their own things.
And, I have a Kobo, an iPad, a laptop, a beeswax candle and a hot water bottle to keep me company.
That actually sounds like a pretty wonderful way to spend a bitterly cold afternoon.